It’s the Fourth of July, and I don’t care. I get to spend my night making sure my dog doesn’t die of a heart attack for a bunch of idiots’ obnoxious display of pseudo-patriotism.

Instead of blowing your fingers off with fireworks this year, consider lighting your face on fire with D’Elidas hot sauce. Why am I promoting hot sauce? Because if it gets more popular it’ll be easier for me to get. I order it on Amazon and sometimes they’re out of the bigger bottles.

This stuff is incredibly good on chicken and pork; it has mustard in it that gives it an excellent flavor. sometimes I get hot wings from the bar and add D’Elidas on top of their wing sauce. Indeed the first time I had this sauce, in Boquete, Panama, that’s how I had it, and I’ve been hooked ever since.

I keep stocked up on Mexican hot sauces (Cholula, Valentina, El Yucateco) and some Yellow Bird from San Marcos, TX, but D’Elidas might be my favorite of the bunch. Get some and put it in your big fat stupid mouth hole.